ted cruz APTed Cruz is Texas’ new teapublican senator and a moron. Here is a partial list of dumb things he has said or done:

  • Last week he attended convicted felon Ali Akbar’s Blog Bash party at CPAC, where he told a small crowd of Breitbart fans that they “have the liberals scared.” No one in the room scored a single point on the president in last year’s election, much less successfully defended or deflected any attack on Mitt Romney. They were all too busy chasing down leads on Brett Kimberlin.
  • At CPAC, Cruz declared himself “a proud wacko bird” in response to John McCain’s lament that dumbasses have taken over his party.
  • Cruz seems to think that being an asshole will make him a successful senator, which is why he made the mistake of messing with Senator Diane Feinstein last week.
  • His criticism of Attorney General Eric Holder is based on a misreading of what he actually wrote. Either Cruz is too dumb to comprehend simple English, or he’s pretending to be that dumb.
  • Cruz thinks that Mitt Romney lost by being too nice to Obama: “by the third debate, I’m pretty certain Mitt Romney actually French-kissed Barack Obama.”
  • The senator believes that George Soros leads a United Nations conspiracy to eliminate golf courses.
  • Islamophobic much? Cruz thinks that sharia law is creeping into your Constitution.