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If you hadn’t heard about them, Missouri’s Tea Party has a D-list celebrity family headed up by former Republican state senator John Loudon and conservative pundit Gina Loudon. The Loudons are best known for starring in the cheesy reality show Wife Swap, where they were set up to  switch shoes with a polyamorous family, and disaster ensued.

Their eldest daughter, Lyda Loudon, is 18 years old. Yesterday, RadarOnline revealed Lyda as the 18 year old beauty dating 57 year old actor Steven Bauer, who is best known for playing Manny Rivera, sidekick to Al Pacino’s character Tony Montana in Scarface. (He currently stars in the show Ray Donovan.) The spread featured provocative selfies lifted from her Instagram and a sensual “sultry” series of photos, including one of her sucking on a cigar that she’s purportedly getting ready to light.

Gina Loudon, Lyda’s mom and a far-right conservative pundit known for her anti-gay views, took to World Net Daily in wake of the publicity, explaining the multitude of reasons that her daughter’s relationship isn’t upsetting, or unnatural, and why people need to get over it, which I will sum up for brevity’s sake:

1. Her daughter is more mature than other girls.

“Many adults she encountered in her life commented that she was an “old soul.” I saw it, too. I don’t believe in reincarnation, but I have to admit that I saw this maturity in her from the time she was a baby.

She launched several efforts to challenge millennials (sic) to take responsibility for their country, and she speaks, writes and consults about it to this day. While just 18, she is not like the 18-year-olds the gossip magazines are used to seeing.”

2. Her daughter is a rare bird, requiring an “equally yoked”, “fair-minded patriot.”

“My husband asked, ‘Why can’t she find a nice millennial boy?” He almost laughed at himself for asking the question. While there are certainly exceptions, career-minded, committed patriots who are equally yoked with Lyda Loudon are rare. She has had many suitors, but she has entertained few. She is challenged by her generation and has taken ownership to do something about it.’ “

3. Her daughter is pure as the driven snow.

“Lyda is committed to waiting until she is married to have sex. She is so committed to virginity that she gave her little sister a purity ring for her birthday, and I sat in awe as I listened to the wisdom of this big sister speak.”

The screed goes on to talk about the various challenges Gina and her husband have found themselves facing with the “outing” of their daughters’ romance, and John has urged her to be patient with the people who think her daughters’ choice in lovers is a bad idea. “Be patient with our friends, Gina. It took us months to get our head around this. You cannot expect people to just suddenly understand. We didn’t.” Gina admits that it was difficult to wrap her head around, but “Several friends asked us to consider whether love really is a choice. Others beseeched us to embrace that she found a special love with a special, gentle man.”

If she stays with him, Lyda’s choice of lovers is okay, and her family and friends will learn to accept it, Gina concludes.

Interesting to see all this love and understanding  comes from a woman who has equated homosexuality with bestiality  and has been known to show up to National Organization for Marriage outings. Hopefully, if any of her children end up coming out to her as gay, she’ll be able to muster the same unconditional love and acceptance, too.