He might have escaped prison time, but conservative fantasy filmmaker and author Dinesh D’Souza was unable to convince a judge to put off his eight month sentence in a halfway house so he could meet his “professional commitments.”

“Application respectfully denied. The court is, in fact, surprised that its 9/23/14 sentence is not already in effect,” Manhattan federal Judge Richard Berman wrote D’Souza’s lawyer Benjamin Brafman Wednesday.

After ripping him as a “compulsive talker,” Berman sentenced D’Souza to just five years of probation for illegally shelling out $20,000 in contributions in the name of others for Republican Wendy Long’s failed 2012 US Senate bid to defeat incumbent Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY). The sentence includes eight months in a halfway house.

Reflecting his client’s amazing sense of privilege, D’Souza’s attorney admitted that the now-convicted felon’s “professional commitments” included two months that he had cleared of actual engagements to be with his daughter. First, D’Souza tried to deny the charges of illegal campaign contributions by ignoring math; now he’s tried to avoid the consequences by ignoring plain the plain meaning of words in the English language. When he does leave the halfway house in eight months, expect D’Souza to try amending the plain meaning of “convicted felon,” too.

  • muselet

    Every news piece on him should identify him as “convicted felon Dinesh D’Souza.”

    –alopecia

    • Note that I have tagged the article “convicted felon.”

      • muselet

        Excellent. Now if only the New York Times will follow suit …

        –alopecia

  • tpartynitwit

    SplishSplash should be shot back to Bangalore via rail gun.

  • IndianCowboy

    Dinesh D’Souza is very special. You atheists are not. You hate the truth. The big truth, which is the Word of God made flesh, or Jesus Christ, and the small truth, as a result. You have to shut it out and shut it down, because it exposes you for what you are, and the evil you always side with.

    • According to the laws of the United States, Dinesh D’Souza is not special. Belief in any particular god does not elevate anyone above the law. If the laws did assign lesser status to atheists as you seem to wish, then they would be evil laws — and they would diminish what moral power your faith still has.

      You’re really challenged by people who don’t buy into your imaginary sky-god, aren’t you? We must scare the hell out of you by proving that your deep guilt and psychological hang-ups are completely unnecessary, that life is possible without them, that you can break your god-shackles and be a fully-developed human being. No wonder you want to retreat to medieval darkness and the comfort of belief in your invisible daddy. It’s so much easier than thinking for yourself…

      • IndianCowboy

        “The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God.’ ” Psalms 14:1, and Psalms 53:1.

        • Sooo you are “proving” that your god exists…with words people wrote down about your invisible god thousands of years ago. Do you see why this is absolutely unimpressive to a rational person?

          • IndianCowboy

            No, i am not trying to prove anything to you. You have all the proof you need that both God and the devil exist. You have made a choice to reject the evidence.

          • I have NO proof that any gods or devils exist. Your scripture is not evidence. Your “feelings” are not evidence. I have not rejected any evidence because you have still not provided any.

          • IndianCowboy

            You lie to yourself and to others when you pretend there is no evidence of God or Satan. There is an incredible amount of proof and it surrounds you. If God withdrew Satan would envelop you. And that is unfortunately the risk you take when you deny His existence. That He will one day abandon you to your beliefs and your refusal to believe in Him. That He will say to you, “Because you were ashamed of Me before men, I am also ashamed of you before My Father,” and, “Depart from Me, I never knew you.”

          • Again, you’re quoting scripture as proof. You say the “proof” is all around me, but all I see is concrete physical reality that obeys laws we can understand through measurement and experiment. Your god is not reproducible. Your devil is not measurable. There is no objective evidence for their existence outside of your belief.

          • IndianCowboy

            I am not offering scripture as proof. I am just sharing it with you. You have the wonder and laws of nature. You have DNA and RNA. The memory of whole persons in a single strand of DNA. You have the First Law of Thermodynamics that states that, “All matter is retrievable in a closed system.” Why? And the Second Law of Thermodynamics, or Dissolution. Who or what is keeping everything from turning to shit, since that is the tendency? I’m sure you have heard the one about the empty jar. Nothing comes from nothing. Put some marbles on the floor. Leave them there. Come back in 50 years. Nothing will change. They won’t move unless there is a force. You have so many miracles, like never missing a meal, and yet they are not good enough for you? There is a reason you don’t want to believe in God, and have chosen not to, and it isn’t lack of proof. Do you believe in evolution, global warming? Have you seen these things? Have you really? Or did you take the word of others? You have ample evidence of Satan. Read about the atrocities being committed right now. Seriously. What more do you need? No one can argue you into faith. It’s a gift, and you get the choice of either accepting or rejecting it. God Bless.

          • ronocca

            You’re simply creating a definition of evidence. I’ve recently been hearning this absurd attempt to apply logic to faith. Give it up. Just stick with the faith meme. You’ll have more credibility.

          • IndianCowboy

            I suspect that you are referring to fossilized remains that are evidence of a global cataclysmic flood, and not a slow deposit of silt, or a creeping glacier, over whole fields of dead animals. The Bible says to be ready to give a reason for your faith, when you are asked. It says that evidence is all around them, but that unbelievers are blind, and that God gives them over to their unbelief.

  • AcquiredExpertise

    You mean like this?

    “Has convicted felon Dinesh D’Souza lost the right to vote for the full five years of his probation, or will he be entitled to register once he completes his eight-month sentence in a half-way house?”

  • justphilip

    He should just be happy he got to spend his sentence in a halfway house, and not in a real jail. I’m sure he will be back with some crazy epiphany he had while serving time!