Rick Perry and Entourage are back in 2015! Entourage (the movie) hit theatres on Wednesday and Rick Perry launched his presidential campaign today to a similar scathing critical response. Rick Perry’s original bid for the Republican presidential nomination in 2012 hit the skids on November 9, 2011. During a debate on that night, Perry promised to eliminate three government agencies as part of his program to cut federal spending. While a bemused Ron Paul looked on, Perry named the Departments of Education and Commerce but was unable to remember the name of the third agency. Perry said “I can’t…The third one, I can’t…Sorry…Oops.” The year 2011 also marked the end of the run of HBO’s Entourage, a popular series chronicling the acting career of A-lister Vincent Chase and his childhood buddies from Queens (Turtle, Eric “E” Murphy, and mugging brother Johnny “Drama” Chase). as they explored the Los Angeles landscape. Vincent’s agent Ari Gold provided quips and charmingly malignant narcissism.

Vincent Chase never travels far without his running mates “Turtle,” “E,” and “Drama,” while Rick Perry clings onto regressive tax policies designed to redistribute wealth upwards to the rich. Perry’s schemes as Governor of Texas included enormous corporate welfare and tax loop holes, a proliferation of toll roads, and massive property and sales taxes. My new article “Entourage Texas Style: Rick Perry 2016 Campaign Edition” reviews Perry’s indictment by a grand jury for abusing official capacity and coercing a public servant (felony charges), his cozy relationship with radical right wing group the American Family Association (AFA), and the culture of corporate cronyism and corruption in the Texas terrain of Rick Perry and Greg Abbott. Quotes from the Entourage television series are mixed in for flavor, along with my Rick Perry parody music videos!

“Call me Helen Keller because I’m a f—ing miracle worker!”

Rick Perry likes to tout his (prior?) record as Governor of the utopian (dystopian?) state of Texas. He would “privatize your mother and deregulate your brother!” Here is America’s most “misunderestimated” (sic) politician Rick Perry live from his Mansion “Disgraceland” singing “Rick Perry got indicted” :

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tIvXAJNljHg

You used to cheer when I would say “Adios Mofo”
I Patrolled the Border on the Sean Hannity show
I sold my soul to the devil – baby
And baby, his name was Karl Rove

Rick Perry got indicted – Who he got indicted
Rick Perry got indicted – he’ll be gone-gone-gone who wo

I started out my political career as a Democrat
Oh but that wasn’t helping me get my wallet fat
I would privatize your mother – baby
And baby – deregulate your brother

Rick Perry got indicted – Who he got indicted
Rick Perry got indicted – he’ll be gone-gone-gone who wo

Baby, baby I got down on my knees for W
I like Dominionism the way that we used to do
School to prison pipeline all the way
We can execute someone new every single day

Rick Perry (Rick Perry)
Open Carry (open carry)
Really scary (really scary)
Rick Perry (Rick Perry)
Abuse of official capacity – coercion of a public servant

“We are gonna get drunk with Russell Crowe and we’re gonna head-butt some (expletive) kangaroos.”

Rick Perry got indicted by a grand jury on August 15, 2014 for abusing official capacity and coercing a public servant (felony charges)! Naturally, I wrote a song about it! Governor Rick Perry of Texas is a hunka-hunka burning corruption. I wrote a song about it, and it goes a little something like this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1UMwMdA-tSc

Has anybody seen Governor Rick Perry?
Let me tell you what he’s done
Criminally indicted for two felonies
Abused the power of his office

Coerced a public servant
That’s what the grand jury said he’s done
Vetoed state prosecutor money
That’s what the grand jury said he’s done

DA Rosemary Lehmberg she got wasted
Many alcoholic beverages she had tasted
Then she went out drinking and driving
But she stayed in office thought she was surviving
But Governor Rick Perry threatened to veto her funding
$7.5 million for public integrity
He faces 5 to 99 abused official capacity
The grand jury indicted him with great tenacity

“Ari, swear to me that you will never again say anything offensive to me about my race or my sexual orientation.”

“I can’t swear to that, but I promise that I will always apologize after.”

My original song “Jesus loves me this I know, ’cause Rick Perry tells me so” chronicles the cozy relationship between the Republican Party and radical right wing group the American Family Association (AFA). The Southern Poverty Law Center categorized the AFA as a hate group.   He also said women, not men, were designed by God to be secretaries. MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow reported that the American Family Association fired Evangelical Radio Host Bryan Fischer as spokesman and director of issue analysis in January because of the following comments he made on the Focal Point Radio Show:

“We know that the Nazi party started in a gay bar in Munich….Adolf Hitler couldn’t get straights to be vicious enough in being his enforcers….When gay activists gain the upper hand, they are thuggish, totalitarian, and repressive. Just as the homosexual stormtroopers for Hitler were to exterminate and eliminate the opposition and beat them into silence that’s what homosexual activists want to do today.”

Bryan Fischer blames the Holocaust on gay people and states that constitutional guarantees of freedom of religion only apply to Christians. It should be noted that Bryan Fischer will continue to host the Focal Point radio program and continue blogging, in following the American Family Association’s policy of allowing “unity and diversity.”

Rick Perry, in partnership with the AFA, held a day of prayer and fasting at Houston’s Reliant Stadium in 2011. On a side note, Louisiana Governor (and potential 2016 Republican presidential candidate) Bobby Jindal served as keynote speaker earlier this year at a prayer rally sponsored by the AFA.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRvO1-cCw2U

Jesus loves me – this I know
’cause Rick Perry tells me so
If I sin I’ll go to hell says
Governor Bobby Jindal

Glory Glory Hallelujah
Homosexual Storm Troopers
Hitler wrote “Mein Kampf,” he was just a little camp
And he hung out at the “Bratwurstglockl” Bar

There’s no such thing as discrimination
In our dominionism nation
Women were designed to be their man’s secretary
If you don’t like what I say you can sue me

“Listen, Lloyd, I want you to put all my files, folders, binders, *everything* into a box! If you find a used condom, an executioner’s mask, and a f–king spike paddle, don’t think, just pack that b-tch! Chop suey!”

Perry’s protégé and former Attorney General and current Governor of Texas Greg Abbott “supervised” the corporate welfare money train “Texas Enterprise Fund” which handed out two hundred and twenty two million dollars of taxpayers funds (without oversight). Abbott then turned around and accepted 1.4 million dollars for his Gubernatorial campaign from the recipients of improper TEF funds. Here’s “The Ballad of Greg Abbott” :

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i_B5mDOInEA

He’s Attorney General under Rick Perry
Where corporations get money for free
The Texas Enterprise Fund was fun
Corporate Welfare for everyone

Greggy, Greggy Abbott, he’s just a really big crook
Greggy, Greggy Abbott, at his record Wendy (Davis) took a look

Two hundred twenty two million dollars of taxpayers funds
Handed out without oversight to everyone
Greggy Abbott covered up this major scam
Pretty soon Greggy Abbott will be on the lam

Greggy, Greggy Abbott, he’s just a really big crook
Greggy, Greggy Abbott, at his record Wendy took a look

He wants to be Governor and serve a spell
Messing up the Government and laws as well
He wants to take over Austin so I hear tell
To hand out more goodies wouldn’t that be swell?

Greggy, Greggy Abbott, he’s just a really big crook
Greggy, Greggy Abbott, at his record Wendy took a look

He lies like a rug, his politickin’s never done
His corporate mission is his favorite one
He got 1.4 million dollars for his campaign funds
From the recipients of improper TEF funds

Greggy, Greggy Abbott, he’s just a really big crook
Greggy, Greggy Abbott, at his record Wendy took a look

He stole from Houston and Austin and so
From the Texas Plains Greggy’s got to go
He went on down to San Antonio
And he’ll even try to steal from the Alamo

Greggy, Greggy Abbott, he’s just a really big crook
Greggy, Greggy Abbott, at his record Wendy took a look

“What the f— are you wearing?”

“I’m trying out new looks! This one’s my Andre 3000. You like?”

Ladies and gentlemen, Rick “hipster” Perry in glasses:

Rick Perry

Song credits:

“Rick Perry got indicted” : Lyrics by James Rustad, Copyright 2014. All Rights Reserved.

“The Rick Perry Song” : Lyrics and Music by James Rustad. Copyright 2014. All Rights Reserved.

“Jesus loves me this I know, ’cause Rick Perry tells me so” : Lyrics and Music by James Rustad, Copyright 2015.
All Rights Reserved.

“The Ballad of Greg Abbott” : Lyrics by James Rustad. Copyright 2014. All Rights Reserved.