Close is close, but sometimes it is not close enough to be close, or it’s too close to not be too close.

Or words to that effect.

In some distant Political Science class, the professor will be tasked to explain that first sentence to his or her students.

For you see, it’s not too close to Election Day to potentially disrupt the Presidential Election by remarking on the discovery of emails on the laptop computer of an aide to the Democratic nominee; emails that may or may not be (but probably are not unless they are) relevant to the investigation of Hillary Clinton’s use of a private email server. Although that revelation may have the effect of tilting the balance of the election to Secretary Clinton’s opponent, 11 days is certainly not too close to Election Day for the Director of the FBI to make that public.

The Republican nominee’s apparent covert ties to the Russian government? Remember them? The former “Evil Empire” that menaced our very existence? Strong evidence that Donald Trump had control of a server that may or may not have had one purpose and that was to communicate with a Russian bank? In Russia? The country run with an iron fist by Vladimir Putin, the dictator that Trump blows kisses to when he sees the dictator’s picture? That guy? Yeah. The FBI may or may not be looking into that relationship (Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid said in a letter to the FBI Director that the two of them have discussed that relationship and the FBI’s investigation thereinto), an investigation that would seem to have far more important implications for the future security of the United States of America than emails that may or may not be significant to an investigation that turned up bupkis? The possibility that the next President of the United States may well be a Manchurian Moscovite Candidate? The possibility that the next American Commander-in-Chief may well be the “useful idiot” of former KGB character out of a Gorky Park storyline?

Well, anyone can see that it’s FAR too close to the election for the FBI to reveal any details of an investigation that might serve to keep a neo-Soviet Stooge out of the Oval Office.

And there you see. It is too close to November 8, unless it is not too close in which case it would be too close to consider the closeness of the date when factoring in the number of days and hours until the polls open and close which may be too soon or not soon enough.

At least, that’s how Kellyanne Conway explained it to me.

Let’s soothe ourselves with music.

If you are of a mind to sit and listen, you are invited to consume today’s “Fat Man Podcast”.

It won’t make things better, but at this point does it matter?