Talk about the state of affairs at the IOC these days. Remember back in the day when athletes attending the Olympics were treated as if they were gods? Well these days they are made to swim in human crap. Not only that, their living quarters are in such disarray that many athletes are saying they don’t even want to attend.

Despite the government’s promises seven years ago to stem the waste that fouls Rio’s expansive Guanabara Bay and the city’s fabled ocean beaches, officials acknowledge that their efforts to treat raw sewage and scoop up household garbage have fallen far short. In fact, environmentalists and scientists say Rio’s waters are much more contaminated than previously thought.

Recent tests by government and independent scientists revealed a veritable petri dish of pathogens in many of the city’s waters, from rotaviruses that can cause diarrhea and vomiting to drug-resistant “super bacteria” that can be fatal to people with weakened immune systems.

Researchers at the Federal University of Rio also found serious contamination at the upscale beaches of Ipanema and Leblon, where many of the half-million Olympic spectators are expected to frolic between sporting events.

“Foreign athletes will literally be swimming in human crap, and they risk getting sick from all those microorganisms,” said Dr. Daniel Becker, a local pediatrician who works in poor neighborhoods. “It’s sad, but also worrisome.”

Sad but worrisome? Yes, its a very sad state of affairs, and as far as worrisome, well, swimming in shit is probably not what anyone would volunteer to do. Oh well, Blame It On Rio…